Based on an Original Sin

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And He saw that it was good. Good, but not great. The project was high-concept but the story was a mess; basically, God needed a writer. That's where I came in. First, God created me, then He created a window so we could have a meeting. He had His people contact my people to schedule it. Of course, I didn't have any people, just some little shapes made out of mud and twigs. That's all God had, too, but He could do that thing where He just breathed on them and suddenly a full size, naked accountant is in your face.

Anyway, we set up the meeting, but God cancelled at the last moment - something about needing a break after working six straight days - and then, when He finally found another window, I arrived at the meeting to discover that He'd created a lawyer. The lawyer made me sign a contract which gave God all the rights to my work, in return for an "additional material" credit, plus an eternal soul, which the lawyer assured me was very valuable, although I've never really figured out how to use it, and it came without any instructions. In the meeting, the lawyer showed no respect for me personally or for the writer's craft. But God was pretty pleased, and after the meeting He asked me how I'd like to develop the lawyer character. Which is how I came up with the idea for Satan.

           

I didn't get credit for the idea of Satan even though I created a lot of the stuff that made the role so distinctive, like the whole 'Lucifer' concept of the good guy who gets brought down by a fatal flaw in his character, which introduces the whole dynamic of an internal conflict and gives the antagonist some real depth. At first God didn't like that, because He thought maybe people would find the villain more interesting than Him, but pretty soon He came up with plenty of ways to make His own character more complex and conflicted. So much so that everyone's been trying to make sense of it ever since. And then, of course, He claimed it was all His idea in the first place. But that was always happening. Basically, He was a jealous God...

funny and not so funny

It's said that comedy depends on context. If a well dressed, dignified man slips on a banana skin it's funny, but it's not so funny if a tramp does it. But what if the rich guy fractures his skull, gets brain damage and becomes a vegetable? Is that funny? It depends on the vegetable. Some vegetables are funnier than others. A cucumber is funnier than a potato but a potato is funnier than a mushroom. But what if the tramp fractures his skull, receives compensation from the shop that sold the banana, buys some fine clothes, gets drunk on champagne, slips on another banana skin, fractures his skull again, loses his short term memory and wakes up wondering where all the fine clothes came from? That could be pretty funny, if it was in a film and the tramp was played by almost anyone except Adam Sandler. But when did you last see a banana skin lying in the street, unless you put it there because you're a comedy writer who's run out of ideas?

So, something can be funny in one context and not in another. It's charming if your kid has an imaginary friend, but not so great if your heart surgeon has one. Try this test. In the following list of examples one is funny and one is not so funny. See if you can tell which is which, and then come up with some of your own.

CLOWNS

1. A clown in a circus.

2. A clown outside your bedroom window at 4AM.

YOUR MOTHER

1. You discover that your mother once wrote fan letters to Michael Jackson.

2. You discover that your mother still writes fan letters to Michael Jackson.

POULTRY

1. A headless chicken runs around a farmyard.

2. A headless chicken runs around your kitchen.

YOUR CAR

1. No sooner do you wash your car than a bird defecates on it.

2. No sooner do you wash your car than your neighbour defecates on it.

DOGS

1. A dog chases its tail.

2. A dog chases its tail, catches it and eats it.

FLATULENCE

1. At a funeral the priest farts.

2. At a funeral the corpse farts.

BABIES

1. A tiny baby sneezes and looks surprised.

2. A tiny baby sneezes, looks surprised and curses, invoking Satan.

OBESITY

1. A very fat man gets stuck in the doorway of a fancy restaurant.

2. A very fat man gets stuck in the doorway of a burning restaurant.

AIRCRAFT

1. The person next to you on a plane laughs while reading a book.

2. The person next to you on a plane laughs while reading the safety instructions.

HANGOVERS

1. You wake up and can't remember where you left your car.

2. You wake up and can't remember where you left your kids.

TRAINS

1. A priest runs for a train, his suitcase flies open and female underwear falls out.

2. A priest runs for a train, his suitcase flies open and female body parts fall out.

TV

1. You start laughing at a character in a TV show.

2. A character in a TV show starts laughing at you.

HEALTH

1. A doctor tells a patient, "I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that you have a week to live. The good news is  that I finally screwed the receptionist last night!"

2. The patient is you.

           

I'll be adding to these periodically. Come up with your own examples. And please post them here.